Episode 5: Chennai, India (10/15)
PETER & SARAH WIN AS DAVID & MARY ARE "MARKED" With the infamous broken hydraulic leg as a point of contention, Peter & Sarah, whose relationship has continued to deteriorate, still manage to claim a second victory as Teams travel to Chennai, India. Airport maneuvers make all the difference as coal miner and wife David & Mary land last in India and never make up the deficit. After receiving the good news from Phil that this is a non-elimination leg, they learn that they would now be "marked for elimination", a new twist in the race. UNEASY ALLIANCE Departing in first place at 1:47am, dating couple Rob & Kimberly open their clue instructing them to fly over 3,000 miles to Chennai, India. First, Teams need to travel by train to Hanoi and purchase tickets to Chennai at a travel agency as Vietnam regulations forbid the buying of tickets at the airport. Pulling into Hai Phong Train Station, Rob & Kimberly wait outside the closed doors as the remaining six Teams, including a thrilled last place Dustin & Kandice, descend upon the station for the first train to Hanoi at 5:00am. With all of the Teams back together again, strategies to get any advantage of a better flight begin to emerge. Still working strong as "the Back Pack", brothers Erwin & Godwin, coal miner and wife David & Mary, and single moms Lyn & Karlyn huddle over a map of Hanoi to determine which travel agencies they should visit first. After overhearing their conversation, Peter sneaks over to beauty queens Dustin & Kandice to forge a tentative alliance in securing tickets to Hanoi by offering use of his map in return for future assistance. Wary of Peter's motivation, Dustin remarks, "I don't trust Peter, but I know that when his best interest is involved, we're probably going to be okay." Walking back to his seat, Peter offers to tell 'the Back Pack where to find the closest travel agency, but, when they don't respond, he doesn't give up the information. Irritated, Lyn retorts, "Tell me and quit telling me you'll tell me. I'm not going to beg you for nothing because I don't need you for anything. Don't keep playing me to be stupid. I'm not stupid." PLAYING AROUND Deciding to up the ante in tactical maneuvers, Godwin pulls out a fake cell phone and begins making pretend phone calls to book tickets to Chennai, remarking, "I want to get in the heads of the other players, make them a little worried." Eavesdropping, Peter takes Godwin's bait and scurries over to the beauty queens to inform them of the back pack's latest endeavors. However, as he sits laughing at Peter's panicked moves, Godwin's plan backfires when Peter & Sarah and Dustin & Kandice borrow a woman's real cell phone and secure tickets. AIR WARS After arriving by train to Hanoi, the seven Teams scatter throughout the city in hopes of finding the fastest flight to Chennai. Working together, beauty queens Dustin & Kandice and friends Peter & Sarah pick up tickets that will get them into Chennai at 11:00am. After slow taxis force the 'Back Pack' to work independently, single mothers Lyn & Karlyn and coal miner and wife David & Mary don't fare too well, booking tickets landing at 12:00pm even after incessantly asking if there was anything sooner. The search by their alliance mates, Erwin & Godwin, ends more successfully as they secure seats on a flight landing at 9:20am, over two hours ahead of the other Teams. While they have to sweat it out waiting for their tickets to arrive by messenger, models Tyler & James and dating couple Rob & Kimberly, working together, also booking tickets on the 9:20am flight. At Hanoi Noi Bai Airport, the 'Back Pack' form once again and the Cho brothers tell their alliance members about their significantly earlier flight landing at 9:20am. Walking over to the Cathay Pacific offices, Lyn & Karlyn and David & Mary snag confirmed seats to Delhi, but can only muster reservations all the way through to Chennai. Knowing they are taking a gamble, they opt to join Erwin & Godwin in hopes of getting further away from Dustin & Kandice and Peter & Sarah, who spend their time making fun of Mary's hurt ankle. David remarks, "As long as we get on the last connecting flight from New Delhi to Chennai, then we're right with our alliance. Hopefully, we can be one, two, three and just shake up this whole race." UPGRADE Landing in the connecting city of Bangkok, friends Peter & Sarah and beauty queens Dustin & Kandice part ways and independently discover a much earlier flight landing in Chennai at 7:50am. While in the process of booking their tickets, Peter walks over to the beauty queens who are very hesitant to offer any information to him. After learning they got the same flight, Peter remarks, "It's too bad the girls didn't share a little bit of information. We had every intention of showing them the same flight, so I'm just a little disappointed in them." Sick of Peter's meddling, Dustin tells Kandice, "We are not working together on that one. All bets are off now." DOWNGRADE Meanwhile, in Delhi, the initial relief in catching up to Tyler & James and Rob & Kimberly turns to despair for Lyn & Karlyn and David & Mary when no tickets remain on the connecting flight to Chennai. After watching their alliance members Erwin & Godwin join the other two Teams in boarding, Lyn & Karlyn catch a huge break when two spots opened up for them. While not getting on the earlier flight, David & Mary don't panic, managing to secure tickets on Air Sahara landing at 10:00am. THE UPPER HAND Landing in Chennai together, Dustin & Kandice and Peter & Sarah race to the bus station in anticipation of a 40-mile trip by bus to the town of Mamallapuram in search of Vallavar Arts & Crafts. On the ride over, the beauty queens cover their driver's mouth to prevent him from telling Peter & Sarah's driver directions to the station. The gesture pays off, as the beauty queens get on the first bus out of Chennai after Peter & Sarah's driver becomes momentarily lost, putting them one bus behind. Later Sarah remarks, "Being beauty pageant queens, you have to be competitive and fierce and I think that streak is definitely showing here." Landing at 9:20am, brothers Erwin & Godwin and single moms Lyn & Karlyn get a quick jump out of the airport to board the third bus to Mamallapuram with dating couple Rob & Kimberly on the fourth bus out and frustrated models Tyler & James get seats on the fifth bus after their taxi driver gets lost. Unaware of their last place position, coal miner and wife David & Mary land in Chennai at 10:00am and board their bus believing they are still ahead of Dustin & Kandice and Peter & Sarah. Arriving in Mamallapuram, Dustin & Kandice dart over to Vallavar Arts & Crafts only to find that it doesn't open until 11:30am which allows Peter & Sarah to catch back up, quipping, "Nice job on the taxi." When the doors open at 11:30am, the two Teams rip open their Detour clue. They have to choose between Wild Things and Wild Rice. In Wild Things, teams have to make their way nine miles to the Madras Crocodile Bank, locate pit 16 and help two wranglers secure one large marsh crocodile and transport it to a new pit. In Wild Rice, Teams make their way 200 yards to the Sri Sthala Sayana Perumal Temple and choose an outline of a traditional design that was drawn on the temple floor. Using a picture for reference, they have to gather specially colored powder made from rice and fill in the pattern so that it matches the picture. NO FUN Getting a jump on the beauty queens, whose taxi gets a flat tire, friends Peter & Sarah tame their wild crocodile long enough to rope it up and transport it even as Sarah still struggle with her hydraulic knee. Opening their clue, the pair learns they have to take a bus back to Chennai and find the Karthik Driving School. While Peter runs out of the crocodile bank to the bus stop shouting for Sarah to follow, Sarah's knee slows her down causing them to miss the first bus by moments and allowing the beauty queens to catch up to them. Crying, Sarah told Peter, "I can't go faster." Peter's response to her crying is a promise not to prod her forward anymore on the race because "there's no in-between" with him. When Sarah suggests that Peter "work on that," he replies he likes the way he is and that the race is about having fun. Not missing a beat, Sarah retorts, "I'm not really having fun with you, Peter." Arriving in Mamallapuram, the Cho brothers and Lyn & Karlyn initially choose to fill in the pattern with colored rice at the temple, but soon discover that the tedious task in the burning sun will take too much time. During the two Teams' indecision on Detour tasks, dating couple Rob & Kimberly passed them to the crocodile pit, but all three share the same bus back to Chennai much to Rob's chagrin. ON TOP AGAIN Back in Chennai, friends Peter & Sarah arrive at the driving school to encounter a Roadblock where one team member has to sit through a driver's education class and then navigate through India's notoriously frenzied streets to pass a driving test while driving on the left side of the road. Taking the wheel for his Team, Peter gasps at the chaotic streets, but ultimately finishes the task, earning a driver's license and the clue that directed him and Sarah to drive the same car with the instructor to the Pit Stop at the Chettinad House, a royal palace completed in 1934. After their tempestuous day, friends Peter & Sarah step onto the mat in first place where Phil informs the pair they have each won a home gym system complete with elliptical trainer and standing air bike. With the other Teams completing their driving exams and checking in, models Tyler & James and coal miner and wife David & Mary battle it out for last place as both Teams opt for the tedious pattern filling task. While the models had a sizable lead, they made a critical mistake in filling circles with the wrong color. However, they recover enough to complete it ahead of the coal miner and wife to catch a bus back to Chennai for a sixth place finish. The stunned duo told Phil their poor showing was "very humbling, but maybe something we needed." MARKED Stepping onto the mat in last place, coal miner and wife David & Mary expect to hear the bad news from Phil, but he informs the thrilled pair that this was the first non-elimination leg. In a new twist in the race, David & Mary do not get their money and possessions taken from them. Instead, on the next leg, they will be marked for elimination. This means, if they did not finish in first place, they will incur a 30-minute penalty when other Teams could check in possibly causing them to be eliminated. On the daunting trial ahead of them, Mary comments, "The challenge he gave us to have to be first is ridiculously hard when we got the competition we got, but anytime I want to give up, I just think of my kids because that's the only reason I left them is to come here and to win a million dollars." *** I'm so sorry because I see Pika usually starts these thread but I'm just busting a gut to say: I HATE PETER !!!!!! What an A-1 World-class jerk!!!! Sarah, honey, listen to Grimme: dump this loser ASAP!!! On the other hand, I'm so glad that Peter and Sarah passed by the Barbies when they had a flat tire...

Grimme, I've no doubt Peeks will be thrilled that you started the discussion this week! I agree that Peter is a world class jerkwad! She is way too good for him and I'm sure their days as a couple are numbered. Barbies, tho? Imma dissent a tad. I have to say I'm startin to route for them just a lil bit, they have their petty moments but I have to admit they are smarter and more determined than I'd originally given them credit for. I still have no front runner team that I would just love to see win. If I had to pick the ones that are the closest to being there, for me, this season so far it's team rehab.

I'm going to have to edit in the summary of the show from the official site, though, in the first post in this thread. I want people to be able to find it easily.

I know I've been absent from this forum this season... Probably because I don't hate Peter the way all of y'all do, and I just don't feel like arguing. But I had to just say, Sarah's as annoying to me as Peter is to the rest of you. Now that that's off my chest, I'll go back to lurking.

I don't hate Peter but I didn't understand why he kept trying to make alliances with people who obviously weren't interested. Sarah is annoying, too. She sure is a whiner. At least Peter is trying to maintain a positive attitude.

Well, I don't like Peter or the "Barbies" especially after seeing the scenes from next week! Look like they are trying to pull another stunt with the 'Bama Moms. I always wonder why Peter didn't bring anything to repair Sarah's limb if something were to happen to it, which it did.

The Amazing Race 10, Episode 5: Drive Me Crazy by Jenn Brasler -- 10/16/2006 Normally when racers go to India, things start to fall apart. Guess what? It’s time to go to India! Will Sarah & Peter’s shaky union withstand the challenge? Or will he just start to annoy everyone else on the race? Will Dustin & Kandice fight their way up from the bottom, or just fight with each other? Why does Jenn want ErGo’s shirts? And what’s the next big twist facing the racers? Previously on Slow Boat to Vietnam: I don’t know because thanks to football, 60 Minutes went late and I didn’t tune in to The Amazing Race until Phil was saying that seven teams remain. So I’ll make up my own previouslies: Peter was a jerk, Sarah is starting to get it, Rob & Kimberly need to be quiet, Dustin & Kandice are the most mature fighters ever, and Tom & Terry were eliminated. I also failed to mention that I loved Erwin’s “let’s hug it out” T-shirt. Anything you want to know beyond that… well, that’s why we have recaps! As Phil said, there are seven teams left: Rob & Kimberly - Dating/Could use some shutting up right about now Peter & Sarah - Recently dating/Sentimental favorites (well, not him)/DUMP HIM NOW, SARAH! Tyler & James (Team Zoolander) - Models/recovering drug addicts/I can’t really tell them apart Erwin & Godwin (Team ErGo) - Brothers/Let’s put those muscles to good use, guys! Mary & David - Married/Sentimental favorites/Still awesome Lyn & Karlyn (Team Dublyn) - Friends/Okay, you can stop talking about your kids now Dustin & Kandice - Friends/I’m very glad they’re still in this We’re still in Vietnam. I have to veto Phil’s brown shirt. Not a good choice. Rob & Kimberly are the first to leave at 1:47 a.m. Their clue tells them to fly to Chennai, India. Are we ever going to get out of Asia? I mean, nothing against Asia, but we’re five episodes in and that’s the only place we’ve seen. Anyway, the teams have to take a train to Hanoi first. Also, because of Vietnamese regulations, they can only buy plane tickets at a travel agency. Rob interviews that the race is an interview for a life together. Do they not realize that it’s not boding well for them? He says that to accomplish that goal (the goal of not killing each other, of course), they need to chill. No kidding. Peter & Sarah leave second. Sarah says she doesn’t hold Peter on a pedestal anymore. Yay! Rock on, Sarah. Zoolander leave next. Recovering addicts, blah blah. James says one of the most difficult parts of the race is not being in control. One of the things they seem to not have control over is their hair because… wow. The guys decide to draw a picture of a train for their driver (good idea), but their train turns out “whack,” so instead they show the driver the clue. Fortunately, it looks like he knows where to go. ErGo leave next. They’re wearing the best shirts I’ve ever seen on this show: they’re bright green and read, “LOST.” Under that is a picture of Phil, and under that, “Reward: bushel of kiwis.” We can see later that the backs say, “Vote 4 Cho.” Awesome. Erwin interviews that they’ve wanted to enjoy the adventure first. If they were in this for the money, they would be lying and cheating. I knew I liked them. And not just because of the shirts. Mary & David leave next, and David says he wants to win so he can stop working in the coalmine. With the money that they could win, they could take their kids to Disneyland and the Grand Canyon. Dublyn leave next as Lyn interviews that other than college, this is the most time that they’ve gotten to spend together continuously. Though even in college, they weren’t roommates, so they didn’t see each other 24/7. They joke that they need some alone time, Karlyn saying that she’s sick of looking at Lyn. Dustin & Kandice are the last to leave, Kandice interviewing that this is do-or-die time and they need to do everything they can. They can’t let people get in front of them just because they’re not being aggressive enough. They hope they won’t get stuck on a train behind everyone else. Rob & Kimberly reach the train station first, but they’re not alone for long - everyone, including Dustin & Kandice, gets there and they all have to hang out together before the first train leaves at 5 a.m. On the train, Zoolander spot people shooting drugs, and this gives them the chance to talk more about their addictions. Tyler explains that he started using as a teenager, after his father died in a car accident. They made him feel normal and took away his pain. Plus, he didn’t have to think about reality. Elsewhere on the train, Erwin says that he’s not sure how the other teams are interacting, but ErGo, Mary & David, and Dublyn have been good about sharing info with each other. They look at maps together and figure out a couple of agencies to go to. Peter notices, and after a few minutes he gets up to “use the restroom.” As he passes ErGo and Dublyn, he offers to tell them where the closest agency to the station is. He then heads to the next car and tells Kandice & Dustin that those three teams are working together. He seems to be fishing for an alliance and offers to let them look at his and Sarah’s map if Dustin & Kandice will remember them in the future. They give him a “yeah, sure” that sounds dismissive to me, and after he leaves, Kandice tells Dustin that Peter’s being nice because he likes Dustin. Dustin says they’ll be taking this on a case-by-case basis. These are smart people right here. On the way back to his seat, Peter passes Dublyn and ErGo again and repeats his offer. Lyn basically calls his bluff, telling him to just say it already. He doesn’t. She says that she won’t be begging him for anything because she doesn’t need him, and he shouldn’t keep trying to play her because she’s not stupid. Lyn, call me. You’re awesome. Remember ErGo’s water guns? They appear to have another toy along with them - a fake cell phone. Godwin uses it to pretend to call a travel agent and get into the other racers’ heads. Peter falls for it. He heads back to Dustin & Kandice’s car while ErGo & Dublyn crack up. Peter tells Dustin & Kandice that Dublyn, ErGo, and Mary & David (who, by the way, were nowhere near ErGo when Godwin made the “call”) made reservations already. He asks the local sitting across from Kandice & Dustin if he can use her cell phone, then tells Kandice & Dustin that he’ll share the phone number with them. He makes the call to book four tickets, telling the agent, “Just know we’re coming.” ErGo & Dublyn are still laughing. In Hanoi, the teams disembark and jump in taxis to get to a travel agency. Zoolander explain that they’re working with Rob & Kimberly. Yeah, that’s a winning alliance. Dustin & Kandice are first to an agency, hoping Peter & Sarah don’t find them there. They do, and Peter asks them not to screw him and Sarah over. Dublyn go to another agency. Zoolander and Rob & Kimberly are at another one. David & Mary and ErGo learn that the agency they’re looking for has moved. Mary & David find a local to lead them to another agency while ErGo head to another one. Kandice & Dustin and Peter & Sarah are told that there’s only one flight leaving Hanoi for Chennai that night; it leaves at 8 p.m. and gets in at 12 p.m. the next day. They decide to book it. Dublyn get the same flight, told there’s nothing faster. Mary tries to double-check that her flight is the fastest; told it is, she and David get the same flight as the other teams. Rob & Kimberly and Zoolander are told about a flight that leaves at 1:35 p.m. and gets to Chennai at 9:20 a.m. They book it. However, they have to wait for a messenger to deliver the tickets to the agency, and they don’t know how long that will take. Oh, and the flight leaves in two hours and they don’t know how long it will take to get to the airport. Oops! Speaking of the airport, Sarah & Peter are already there. Kandice & Dustin are on their way. Dublyn reunite with Mary & David and learn that they’re on the same flight. They’re not sure where ErGo are. ErGo happen to be learning of a flight that leaves at 7 p.m. and arrives in Chennai at 9:20 a.m. They’re happy about that. Dublyn and Mary & David meet up with Sarah & Peter at the airport and Lyn asks what flight Peter & Sarah are on. “Tahiti,” he replies. She asks if he means Thai and he says that they must be on the same flight. He’s very elusive during the whole exchange, but I can’t fault him - Dublyn don’t like Peter & Sarah, so why would they expect straightforward information? Also, no one ever said Sarah & Peter had to share anything with them. Sorry, Dublyn - it’s a competition, and you shouldn’t expect help from a team you probably wouldn’t help anyway. Zoolander and Rob & Kimberly are still waiting for the messenger. Finally one arrives and they head off for the airport. ErGo meet up with Dublyn and Mary & David, telling them about their better flight. And unfortunately for those two teams, they can’t switch tickets, since they have to be purchased at a travel agency. David hopes that there’s some way around that rule. Well, there is, but you’ll wind up being penalized for it, so I wouldn’t recommend it. Zoolander and Rob & Kimberly arrive at the airport. Mary & David and Dublyn try to get on the other flight, but while they can get seats to Delhi, they can only get reservations from Delhi to Chennai. They aren’t sure about taking the risk, especially since it means flying with Sarah & Peter and Kandice & Dustin. Okay, other than “taking” their boat in the last episode, what do Dublyn have against Dustin & Kandice? Sheesh. In the end, the two teams decide to take the better flight to Delhi. Elsewhere in the airport, Peter does a horrible Mary imitation for Sarah, Kandice, and Dustin. Shut up, Peter. ErGo join them and tell them about their flight; Godwin explains that the other teams asked them and they didn’t want to lie. Then just don’t answer the question! That could have been a huge mistake. It doesn’t matter in the end, though, because Peter & Sarah and Dustin & Kandice decide to stick to their original flight, hoping that Dublyn and Mary & David will be hurt by not having confirmed seats from Delhi to Chennai. Rob & Kimberly and Zoolander’s flight leaves. They’re pretty sure they’re in front. David & Mary, Dublyn, and ErGo leave next, David hoping that they can be the first three teams. Kandice & Dustin and Sarah & peter leave next. Rob & Kimberly and Zoolander seem to have a lengthy layover as Kimberly is wondering if they can sleep in an airport. In Bangkok, Kandice & Dustin and Sarah & Peter attempt to get an earlier flight to Chennai. Kandice & Dustin learn of one that arrives at 7:50 a.m. As they head to the check-in gate, they spot Sarah & Peter, who are being told of the same flight. Peter asks “D” which flight they’re on but Dustin keeps quiet, saying they’re not confirmed yet. She heads off to get something to drink, and Peter comes over and peeks over Kandice’s shoulder, confirming that they’re on the same flight. Kandice gives the camera a hilarious eyeroll. When Dustin returns, Kandice fills her in and they decide that they’re not working with Sarah & Peter anymore. As the two teams head for their new flight, Peter says that they would have shared their info with Dustin & Kandice. Well, boo hoo. ErGo aren’t happy to see Rob & Kimberly and Zoolander at the airport, and Rob & Kimberly and Zoolander are just as unhappy to see them, Mary & David, and Dublyn. They have less than half an hour to get seats to Chennai. Dublyn and Mary & David have to be placed on a waiting list while Zoolander, ErGo, and Rob & Kimberly get to board. Dublyn get their tickets, but unfortunately for David & Mary (who, unfortunately, try both begging and the “emergency” excuse), don’t have any luck - they don’t get on the flight. However, they do get on another flight that arrives at 10 a.m. Kandice & Dustin are the first to get a cab in Chennai. They’re on their way to Mamallapuram to look for an arts and crafts place. Sarah & Peter head off second, Peter noting that they’ve gone from one polluted city to another. Way to see the bright side, Peter. Kandice & Dustin’s cab driver tries to give some help to Sarah & Peter’s driver, but the blonds quickly shush him, covering his mouth to keep him from talking. Okay, that’s going a little too far. Sarah says the blonds are fierce competitors and it’s showing. Thanks, Sarah. We knew that. Dustin & Kandice get to the bus station first and wind up on a bus by themselves. With everyone now in Chennai except David & Mary, the other four teams head towards the station as well. Zoolander wind up with a very confused driver. Mary & David land and head off thinking that they’re last unless Sarah & Peter or Kandice & Dustin had some flight misfortunes. In fact, Dustin & Kandice arrive at Mamallapuram first, though it’s closed until 11:30 a.m. This gives Sarah & Peter a chance to catch up. Dublyn and ErGo catch a bus together, followed by Rob & Kimberly on another. Karlyn interviews that she actually felt relaxed and comfortable in India; people there have “more substance to their bodies,” unlike in Vietnam, where she and Lyn were stared at for not, shall we say, being size 2’s. Kimberly, apparently having seen past seasons, tells Rob not to let anyone touch her. They complain about the smell and Kimberly says she wanted to go to Europe. How about the Tower of London? Can I show you a nice cell in the Tower of London? They want to be with the “rich folk.” I think you’ve picked the wrong show to be on, guys. Next time try The Apprentice. Zoolander are waiting for a bus. At 11:30, Kandice & Dustin and Sarah & Peter receive their next clue, a Detour. The choices are Wild Things or Wild Rice. In Things, teams go to a crocodile bank, which is not a bank where you withdraw crocodiles, but more like a crocodile farm. There, they have help wranglers transport a croc to a new pit. In Rice, teams go to a temple and use colored powder made from rice and color a pattern to match a picture. Just looking at the patterns, which are huge and contain many different-colored circles, I would definitely have to go with Things. (Also, I’m happy there are no Crocodile Hunter imitations in this episode, since that would just make me sad.) Both teams choose Things. Zoolander finally catch a bus. Dustin hopes they don’t have to touch a crocodile’s snout. She should be more worried about getting there at all, since their cab has a flat tire. Sarah & Peter make their driver pass without stopping. Eh, I’ll let it go. There was no accident, obviously no one was injured, and their driver was taking care of things and didn’t seem to need any help. Peter could look a little less gleeful, though. He and Sarah reach the bank first and Peter tries to get her to run. Shut it, Peter. A couple of wranglers grab a croc and Peter and Sarah put bands around its snout. Peter gives Sarah way more advice than she needs. When did you become the new Crocodile Hunter, Peter? Shut it once again. Kandice & Dustin get back on the road, all patched up. Sarah & Peter help transport the croc onto something that looks like a horizontal ladder. They tie it down and carry it to the next pit. Sarah seems a little apprehensive and Peter takes the opportunity to treat her like a child. I’m telling you, Sarah, take the band off that croc’s mouth and let him go to town. Kandice & Dustin get started, also nervous. Part of transporting the croc involves climbing over a short wall, which gives Sarah some trouble. “Come on, sister,” Peter tells her. Ewwwww. If I had a boyfriend who called me “sister,” I’d have to dump him right then and there. More wrangling. More of Peter being annoying and bossy. Sarah & Peter’s crocodile is closed-mouthed (heh) about whether he or she likes his or her new home. Oh, well. You can’t please everyone. They get their next clue, which tells them to take a bus back to Chennai and find a driving school. Ooh, interesting. Sarah & Peter head out of the park to catch a bus, but Sarah isn’t quite fast enough and they miss it. They sit down so Peter can have a snack and Sarah can have a cry. She tells Peter that she can’t go any faster. “Sarah, I’m not asking you to go faster,” he condescends. I would like to tape everything he says and play it back for him because YES, YOU ARE. “Get it together, Sarah. Come on,” Peter says. First of all, chew with your mouth closed. Second of all, don’t talk with your mouth full. Third of all, shut up. He passive-aggressively tells her that if this is the way she’s going to be, he’ll downshift and stop being aggressive with the race. Sarah tells him that’s not what she meant, of course, and maybe he needs to find a happy medium. Peter says he likes who he is. I’m glad someone does. She reminds him that they’re a team, and he responds that they’re in first place. “Remember, it’s just a game. We’re just having fun,” he adds. “I’m not really having fun with you, Peter,” she replies. DUMP HIM! Or at least band his mouth shut like he’s a croc. Dustin & Kandice finish the croc transport. Dustin cracks me up by asking, “Once we let him go, can we run?” They get their clue and hightail it out, catching up with Peter & Sarah at the bus stop. Dublyn and ErGo get the Detour clue, both choosing Rice. ErGo aren’t sure it’s the best choice, but they decide to at least look at the design first. At the temple, they all have to remove their shoes and socks before entering. ErGo decide to “just burn through it.” Speaking of burning, the ground is hot, and without anything on their feet, the teams might be in for some trouble. Kimberly & Rob choose Things and head off in a cab. Kimberly spots a cow out in the street and asks, “Is it a homeless cow?” Rob rubs his face disbelievingly and the awesome sound guys insert a “doing” sound effect. Sarah & Peter and Kandice & Dustin get on a bus. With the sun beating down, Dublyn and ErGo quickly decide that Rice is a bad choice and head off to do Things instead. Rob & Kimberly are there, working together pretty well and finishing quickly. Zoolander and ErGo spot each other from different buses. At the bus stop, Kimberly & Rob learn that buses come by once every half hour. Rob the mathematician realizes that this means they’ll have a half-hour lead on any team on a bus behind them. Unfortunately for them, they spot ErGo and Dublyn at the croc park and realize that they may not get that lead. Zoolander get to the Detour clue and pick Rice. Kimberly & Rob are anxious about getting on a bus, but the right one hasn’t come by yet. ErGo and Dublyn hurry with the Detour, though Lyn has problems with the wall. They seem to get through without any other problems and they all catch up to Rob & Kimberly at the bus stop. At the temple, Zoolander remove their shoes and head to the patterns, noting that this could take a while. Rob & Kimberly, ErGo, and Dublyn get on a bus. Sarah & Peter and Kandice & Dustin catch cabs to the driving school. Zoolander do Rice but have trouble telling yellow and beige apart. Mary & David finally get the Detour clue. David lets Mary choose and she picks Rice, though he thinks Things would be faster. Mary thinks it could be farther away, and she’s afraid of crocs anyway. At the temple, they put on traditional garb, which Zoolander forgot to do. Mary quickly starts haranguing David, who still wishes they were with the crocs. “What in the world makes you think that I would want to go wrestle a crocodile?” she asks. Touché. Peter & Sarah are first to the driving school, which offers up a Roadblock: “Who is the driving force behind this team?” Well, we all know who Peter thinks that is. This task requires one team member to take the steps necessary to get an Indian driver’s license. Awesome. That racer has to take a driving school class and a behind-the-wheel test (on the left side of the road). Peter takes the Roadblock, of course. The driving class is a lot more interesting than the driver’s ed classes I had to take in high school. The instructor (whom I love, by the way) shows Peter how to position his arm when he wants to turn right. He adds that traffic signals have to be obeyed, and if animals or children appear in the road, he’s to honk his horn. The best part is that the instructor has a horn he uses to demonstrate this. I need one of those. I can think of a million ways that would come in handy in my everyday life. Also, it sounds like a duck, which is awesome as well. Done with his class, Peter gets behind the wheel with a different instructor. The guy’s advice consists of him telling Peter to not drive crazy or hit a bus. That’s just good life advice in general, you know? Peter does fine with the driving, and when he’s done, he and Sarah get a clue sending them to the Pit Stop, Chettinad House. Hello, royal palace! Kandice & Dustin get to the Roadblock, which Dustin takes. Zoolander and David & Mary are still doing Rice. Zoolander think they’re done, but they’ve made one too many circles on the outside. Dustin is very excited to get behind the wheel. She does pretty well, despite driving on the wrong side of the road at one point, and gets compliments from her instructor, whom she hugs at the end. He doesn’t look displeased by that. Peter & Sarah are the first to the Pit Stop and receive a home gym system. Definitely a fitting gift for them. Rob & Kimberly grab a taxi. ErGo and Dublyn are told that they can walk to the driving school. Dustin & Kandice get to the mat in second place. Yay! Phil asks if he’s looking at the first two-female team to win the race. Kandice sing-songs that she thinks he is. Rob takes the Roadblock. The instructor tells him not to drink and drive. “Drink what?” Rob asks. He laughs when he realizes that the instructor wasn’t telling him the name of a beverage to avoid. At the temple. Zoolander finally finish for real and are allowed to leave. David complains so more and Mary tells him that if he wants to switch, he should tell her now. He replies that they could have wrangled two crocs by now. Rob drives, seeming to enjoy himself. As he gets his clue, the instructor repeats that he shouldn’t drink and drive. Heh. ErGo and Dublyn arrive and Godwin and Lyn take the Roadblock. They get more honking lessons. Lyn has trouble remembering which side to drive on. She and Godwin (and their instructors) survive and get their clues. Rob & Kimberly hit the mat in third and share a kiss and hug. They barely fought on this leg! I’m proud of them. David & Mary finish up Rice. ErGo get to the Pit Stop in fourth place. Phil asks for an explanation of their shirts. “This person’s a very important person,” Erwin says, pointing to the picture of Phil. Oh, you have no idea, Erwin. Phil doesn’t think the photo they chose of him is very flattering. Tyler takes the Roadblock, telling the instructor, “That’s a good horn.” Hee. Dublyn hit the mat in fifth place. They’re worried that David & Mary aren’t around and hope this is a non-elimination let. Tyler finishes and he and James head to the mat, arriving in sixth place. James tells Phil that this is very humbling but maybe something they need. It’s dark now, but the driving school is still open. David takes the Roadblock as Mary interviews that they knew they were in last place. The race puts them in stressful situations, but Mary is proud of David for being strong and stubborn and not wanting to quit. “I love him even more than the day I came on this race,” she says. Aww! They finally get to the Pit Stop, where they’re told that they’re last… but it’s a non-elimination leg. Yay! But wait - there’s more. Unlike in previous non-elimination legs, they won’t be mugged. Instead, in the next leg, they’ll be “marked for elimination” - if they don’t come in first, they’ll incur a 30-minute penalty. On the one hand, ouch. On the other hand, that makes things a lot more interesting. Mary says that this is tough, especially considering the teams they’re up against, but she has to keep racing because of her kids - the only reason she left them was to come win the million dollars. Next week: Dublyn try to Bogart a local so he can’t help Kandice & Dustin. There’s some task involving a camel and something that looks like a robot. Maybe they’re having a camel race instead of a horse race?

The Amazing Race 10: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, Episode 5: Priorities by Mike DeGeorge -- 10/17/2006 Erwin & Godwin have been enjoying themselves on the race, sometime to their own detriment. Where does this place them in Mike’s book? And what about that non-elimination? Plus, an Amazing Race article wouldn’t be complete without complaining about Peter. It’s all inside! No, you didn’t miss it, my column for last week was never written thanks to a cocktail of computer problems, an anniversary, and birthday party all in the space of a few days. I was too exhausted over the weekend to do much of anything, so my apologies. Really, there wasn’t much to talk about. They rowed a lot and yelled, and Tom & Terry, who I didn’t DISlike but were starting to annoy me, were eliminated. One other bit of interest – I mentioned McCain’s flight suit two weeks ago, and got the following email from a man named Roland that I thought was quite eloquent, and which I also agree with 100%, so I thought I’d pass it along: Although I do agree that is was kind of freaky to have McCain's flight suit there on display, but did you notice that only a few of the contestants stopped and paid respect to our great Senator? I (as a Vietnam Veteran) feel that the least these people should have done was to pause for a moment to pay their respects! We lost more then 58,000 American Troops in that War, and these people that were probably just a gleam in their parents eye when this happened, at least should have done this! I noticed more then half didn't even look at the suit, it was embarrassing for me, as a Veteran to think that the only thing people today think of is MONEY, PERIOD! Not the people that allowed them the freedom to do the things they are doing today! Well said. I’ve said it a million times, but one million and one won’t hurt. Yes, they’re on a race for a million dollars, but they’re going to places that they may never see again. Recent events in my own life have reminded me how wonderful memories are. Do these people want their only memory of such a historic segment of our country’s past to be jostling each other around for a little yellow envelope? As Roland said, it’s disrespectful, bordering on the pathetic. The Good: Non-Elimination is Good?: Frequent readers know my anti-non-elimination stance (at least when it doesn’t benefit a favorite team). Well, that’s changed. My biggest beef with the rule was the lame “give up all your money and possessions” which, nine times out of ten, doesn’t matter a lick by the first commercial. Now, the producers have pulled one out of their asses and come up with a truly inventive penalty. Now a saved team can’t just toil in the rear like they have been able to in the past. If David & Mary don’t finish first, they will receive a thirty-minute penalty. Obviously, this means that they have to fight through the pack and finish high enough to keep that penalty from killing them. It’s what I’ve been asking for – a true penalty that actually affects the game. It’s what this sort of game-saving “second chance” is supposed to be. “Hey, we’re saving you this time, but you’ve got to step it up next leg!” Perfect. Of course, there will probably be an immediate equalizer, in which case, I’ll retract everything I just sad. And Oh, By the Way: David & Mary didn’t get eliminated! WOO-HOO! Here’s hoping they finish first next leg and the prize is a family trip to Disneyland. I would pony it up, but I’m still trying to save the money to take my own family. Donations accepted, of course. Dustin & Kandice: I haven’t said much about the beauty queens, but I’ve been pleasantly surprised, like most people, with how shrewd and quick they are. Especially in quickly seeing through Peter’s crap. We get a lot of teams talking about breaking stereotypes, but here’s one doing it with a sledgehammer, so good for them. The Bad: We Wuz Robbed: Rob and Kim’s arguing isn’t getting to me, nor does their hideous whining about foreign countries. After all these seasons, it almost just rolls off. What annoys me more than anything, though, is that these idiots keep finishing high! What Cho Talkin’ Bout?: I have to tell you, I think the idea of bringing a fake cell phone to psyche out the other teams was a fantastic idea. The problem is, the Cho Brothers chose a horrible time to utilize it. Of course, it gave other teams (particularly Peter) the idea that they could call ahead also. What they should have done is used it at a random moment. On a taxi ride to some monument somewhere, pass another team and make sure they see you with the phone to your ear. They’ll go crazy wondering who you’re calling and why. Basically, any time where a phone WOULDN’T have made sense – any time except when you’re on your way to the airport! Also, I’m all for honesty and playing fair, but telling other teams your plans just because they asked isn’t very smart. Yes, I know what I said above about racing for the experience, but if you get eliminated for not racing, you won’t get to experience much, will you? Baby, You Can Drive My Car: I don’t even like driving in St. Louis. No way I would have done that Roadblock! Not to be Rude: But is anyone else sick of hearing the models talk about overcoming drug addiction? I know it had to be horrible, I know how hard it must have been, but last time I heard, isn’t overcoming addiction all about going forward? The Ugly: Peter is Yadda Yadda: This is going to be quick. Everyone is, now that the producers are hitting them over the head with it, loudly proclaiming what a jackass Peter is. Since I realized this a few episodes back, I’ll refrain from commenting here. I will say one thing, though. I sincerely hope that Sarah breaks out of the Amazing Race mode of proclaiming that everything is OK at the end of the race, and she really does care for him. You know, exactly the speech Kimberly will make when they leave us. I can see why she fell for him. Everyone, man or woman, likes to be taken care of. Her leg was bad, he made it better, swoon. Let’s hope these open eyes don’t close back up at their (hopefully soon) Philimination.